Chicago Labbies

This article is for the parents who also have an inferiority complex when it comes to "Labbies."

The Lab Mystique

A place where every five-year-old intimidates me

By Jeff Ruby

My wife graduated from the University of Chicago Lab Schools, which means I have spent my marriage enduring stories about how great Lab School is. Most Labbies are insufferable about their affiliation with Hyde Park’s legendary private school, constantly reminding the rest of us that they’re smarter and more confident and better connected than we are. Sarah’s fellow alums matriculate at universities with lofty mottos like Lux et Veritas, and they often become deans at those universities; underachievers go on to the Supreme Court or the top of major Hollywood studios.

I am the product of public schools in Wichita. My old classmates have gone on to be Wichitans. While Sarah was learning needlepoint with Mayor Daley’s son and dating the offspring of notorious antiwar guerrillas who bombed the U.S. Capitol, I was tipping cows and memorizing dates (Magna Carta: 1215, Battle of Hastings: 1066). The only notable person to attend my high school was the actress Kirstie Alley, who probably should have stayed a Wichitan.

Sarah recently stuck the knife in farther by taking a job teaching preschool at her alma mater. Her first class included kids from Italy, Russia, Greece, Korea, Spain, Indonesia, China, Germany, India, Iran, and France, the progeny of academics and inventors and authors. She had black kids and white kids, biracial kids and kids of gay couples. The room was like a U.N. meeting with potty accidents.

On my first visit to Sarah’s classroom, I immediately saw what made Lab so special. Ideas and games and performances bounced around the room with such velocity that I couldn’t keep up. When Sarah caught a kid breaking a rule about turning his fingers into a gun, the tyke’s protest was simple and logical: “Guns shoot bullets. This shoots lasers.” Another child lectured anyone who would listen on the flight patterns and habitats of pigeons at Brookfield Zoo. Whispers circulate among teachers about a first grader who wrote her own King Lear for children. When these kids talk matter-of-factly about spending spring break at Camp David with Barack and Michelle, it’s easy to forget that they aren’t more than a couple years out of diapers.

No matter how many stamps Labbies have on their passports, though, they’re still only four or five, and so are their brains. One day, a boy asked Sarah how long he should microwave his lunch. “Well, you had the same sandwich yesterday,” she said. “How long did you microwave it yesterday?”

“Thirty seconds. It was too hot. I hurt my tongue.”

“If 30 seconds is too long, how long do you think you should try today?”

He thought for a moment. “Forty seconds.”

I find this exchange reassuring. My inferiority complex can run wild, but at least I’ve mastered the concept of greater than–less than.

Now my precocious four-year-old daughter goes to Lab too, and I’m being served the Kool-Aid again. But this time I’m drinking it willingly, as only a proud parent can, watching her soak up everything the school has to offer. It hit me—my kid is a Labbie—when we were gaping at a brilliant leopard at the Lincoln Park Zoo, and I asked if she thought his spots were pretty.

“They are,” she said. “But they’re not spots, Daddy. They’re rosettes.”

South Koreans & Racism

South Korea, a country where until recently people were taught to take pride in their nation’s “ethnic homogeneity” and where the words “skin color” and “peach” are synonymous, is struggling to embrace a new reality. In just the past seven years, the number of foreign residents has doubled, to 1.2 million, even as the country’s population of 48.7 million is expected to drop sharply in coming decades because of its low birth rate.

Many of the foreigners come here to toil at sea or on farms or in factories, providing cheap labor in jobs shunned by South Koreans. Southeast Asian women marry rural farmers who cannot find South Korean brides. People from English-speaking countries find jobs teaching English in a society obsessed with learning the language from native speakers.

For most South Koreans, globalization has largely meant increasing exports or going abroad to study. But now that it is also bringing an influx of foreigners into a society where 42 percent of respondents in a 2008 survey said they had never once spoken with a foreigner, South Koreans are learning to adjust — often uncomfortably.

In a report issued Oct. 21, Amnesty International criticized discrimination in South Korea against migrant workers, who mostly are from poor Asian countries, citing sexual abuse, racial slurs, inadequate safety training and the mandatory disclosure of H.I.V. status, a requirement not imposed on South Koreans in the same jobs. Citing local news media and rights advocates, it said that following last year’s financial downturn, “incidents of xenophobia are on the rise.”

Halloween!

- There's plenty of candy to go around...I love this holiday! I've been busy at school with my pumpkin and leaf drawings. Plus, we've been going to many fests to get our fill of the season.
- We had a potluck dinner with my friends at school. I was busy stuffing my face while my friends were occupied with each other. I have my priorities straight.
- Also, over the weekend, I had a really fun play date with my friends in Evanston. And we indulged in a huge pumpkin cake. I was all prepared to sing Happy Birthday, but I guess that wasn't the right occasion. Nevertheless, I had a really large slice of cake and indulged in every bite.
- This past week, we went to a couple of Halloween events and I got to see some beautiful costumes. Next year, I want to be a butterfly. This is a compromise with my daddy since I can never be a princess. Lately, he has me chanting "I'm a tomboy. Yeah!" I say it with much more enthusiasm than he does though.
- Also, I'm psyched for tomorrow's trick-or-treating...we're going to Glencoe's downtown and then, to our neighborhood. I should get a truckload of candy, but I think my mama's the biggest gatekeeper of sweets. She's sooo not fun sometimes.

North vs. South

Apparently, the Northern Chicagoans and the Southern Chicagoans are vastly different in personalities...the Northsiders are neurotic while the Southsiders are agreeable...kinda funny that there was a research study on this trend if you ask me.

Long Overdue Photos

at the exploratorium

che go!

with the Damo family

enjoying the orchards

Winnetka's Fire Station/Police Station Open House

celebrating Mikel's 30th birthday

photo day at school

Winnetka's Halloween Fest

with Ginger, our neighbor

RKMS (my school) Pumpkin Fest

Sreamers

Screaming is the new spanking...

Crunch, Crunch, Crunch

- That's the sound of leaves when we go on our walks these days. Autumn is definitely here to stay...Got my pumpkins ready for the season, and I've been creating many fall-like art projects at school. I come home from school with my art work in tow and I get to tape it to our windows. That's what my mama calls creative window treatments and they're easy on our wallets.
- My parents were ill last week with some bug. They hit a wall while I continued my usual antics around the house - dancing, jumping, and messing around.
- I went to the open house at our local fire station and police station. Everyone was very friendly and doled out tattoos (temporary!), balloons, crayons and badges. My parents and I also went on a tour of the police station and saw all their cool electronics, restraint systems, and jail cells. If I call 911 or get handcuffed (i.e. for my cuteness), I know exactly what to expect. Knowledge is power.
- Also, my directress/teacher at my school mentioned to my mama that she thinks I have a very good sense of humor. Who me? Yeah, I like to giggle with my best friends and have lots of fun. Isn't this just normal? You mean, there are toddlers that scowl and are grumpy? Oh, I have those days too!
- We had a pretty quiet week. My appetite is growing, and my parents think I'm getting heavier. Maybe it's all the pasta I've been eating going straight to my tush. I'll know more tomorrow when I go for my 2.5 year check up. My doc will give it to me straight!

Welcome to Autumn!

- It's been awhile and some highlights include fall-specific activities. Went apple picking for the first time in my life last Saturday. I really enjoyed the apples (eating and stepping on them), train ride with my daddy and the petting zoo (goats and all).
- A few Saturdays ago, my mama ran in a 5K..whatever that means. I just cheered her on while she panted through her run. It's more fun in the sidelines in my opinion.
- I've been adjusting much better to school life. I really enjoy the time there but wish I could bring all my toys. My mama thinks I'll lose my "friends," but little does she know that my grip is strong.
- I had another fun play date with Jack, my buddy. He woke me up from a nap one afternoon, and I was ecstatic despite my bed hair/appearance. My mama just loves to surprise me.
- We took our pictures at school the other day, and of course, my mama tried to coach me. She thinks my normal smile is way too squinty...she's so critical.
- The other day we tried the Exploratorium and I had the place all to myself for awhile. I had my pick of toys and activities. It's sometimes nice to be a loner.
- Also, I met my mama's friend's 4 children. They're of all different ages, but I'm the youngest...which translates to all of them doting on me. It was quite the treat to hang out with bigger kids. They're all sooo cool...can't wait to hang out with them again.

Happiness for Women - The Paradox

Maureen Dowd explains the paradox that women face as they age. The reality is that women seem less happy despite all the choices we have on our plates. One realization points to kids as the happiness killer! To read further, click on the link. Here's an excerpt...

When women stepped into male- dominated realms, they put more demands — and stress — on themselves. If they once judged themselves on looks, kids, hubbies, gardens and dinner parties, now they judge themselves on looks, kids, hubbies, gardens, dinner parties — and grad school, work, office deadlines and meshing a two-career marriage.

“Choice is inherently stressful,” Buckingham said in an interview. “And women are being driven to distraction.”

One area of extreme distraction is kids. “Across the happiness data, the one thing in life that will make you less happy is having children,” said Betsey Stevenson, an assistant professor at Wharton who co-wrote a paper called “The Paradox of Declining Female Happiness.” “It’s true whether you’re wealthy or poor, if you have kids late or kids early. Yet I know very few people who would tell me they wish they hadn’t had kids or who would tell me they feel their kids were the destroyer of their happiness.”

The more important things that are crowded into their lives, the less attention women are able to give to each thing.

Photos...

...as promised.